Our story
A lot of what we do here we do for love. What kicked it all off was caring for Doreen - the Mum of one of our team - who had dementia. She came to live with her son and because the office was beside the house, she was often in our team space, hanging out, drinking tea or having a chat. The team quickly learned a lot about dementia and aging. They also got used to the necessary adjustments to taps, toilets, routines and shifts in their interactions as Doreen’s needs changed. Everyone without exception learned how to navigate her worries and anxiety with kindness, made space to have fun with her and make her smile, and gave love with their care. She was part of all our lives and, while it definitely got tough, it enriched all of us to be a part of her journey.
Caring for our elders is something most of us arrive at a bit unprepared. Even though it can be a major life change with lots of learning and adjustments, there is not as much out there in the way of resources as you might hope. We were really taken aback to find such a big gap. So we decided to create Elderflowers to help - offering access to information, ideas, wisdom and products to support anyone who needs it that is caring for partners, parents, grandparents, or other important older people in their lives.
OUR INSPIRATION
Doreen
Lover of life, the sea, ice cream, champagne, anchovies and a good Frank Sinatra song. Doreen was the inspiration for Elderflowers. It is our tribute to the ups and downs and the joys of dementia – because we had some fun we did…
The help centre
We started with a bunch of research. What’s going on for people? What do they need?
One of the most major emotional experiences described was guilt. And the biggest drivers of that guilt are:
Not being sure what to do.
Feeling like you are not able to do enough.
Worry that you’re not doing the right thing.
These are not surprising when there’s no clear roadmap for the path you’re on. That’s why we started with the caregiver’s journey and what to expect, followed by some practical tools to get you up to speed on key issues and the admin. You’ll find it all in the Help Centre.
Love of Elderflowers
We were quick to discover that what information there is ‘out there’ often tends to portray ageing as a negative and medical issue. Far too few resources seemed to focus on how to find value or pleasure in the experience. Those that do are hard to find. We’re not saying it’s all wine and roses - things can get pretty hard. But there is value in caring for our elders, pleasure can be a big part of things and it is often founded in love. We feel these things could do with more positive emphasis, which is why this site is committed to just that. We hope you can see it in the way we express things – and that positivity catches on.
Greening eldercare
The age care category has got some serious sustainability issues to address. Many of the basic requirements of day-to-day living have significant ecological implications – the levels of landfill from incontinence products being used far outstrips the disposable nappy problem. Or the impacts of the production and use of plastics in equipment (particularly those with single use or short life spans), and the production and use impacts of chemical and synthetic ingredients in many personal care products. Is older skin not good enough for organics, we ask?
The category is ripe for some love, some fun and for some green sensibilities. You will find we promote products that deliver on that.
How does it work?
The work has been founder-funded. But to make it work ongoing, the financial ‘how’ is in the margins we make through our affiliate links and what we charge for our own products. Each time you use this site to buy a product from an affiliate, you are helping to nourish and grow the Elderflowers project. So please keep coming. Tell others. Check out our affiliate page to understand how it all works.
The book shop
Welcome to our lovely library – where you can find all sorts of books on all sorts of elder related subjects. We rate the books we have read, and we share the ratings of others if we have not read them yet. Please let us know what you think of any of them and share any you think should be here that you can’t see. Each book links to bookselling affiliates. Each book bought supports the Elderflowers project.